delicate string of pearls

Hello! :)

I'm feeling particular perky tonight.

Finished Amath homework and only left with ORCA! *grin*

Amath makes me feel accomplished, like my whole education life has not been for nothing and that I'm actually smart. #likeanerd

4 tests next week. Life's getting hectic and I'm real worried for Lit.

My in contempt teacher only started worrying today. Oh no.

Anyway I'm zonked out today (Zzzz)

So i'll blog more tomorrow!

Excited about this weekend.

It's gonna be a good one :]

day 1 of lurking

I feel like going to the beach and lying in the sea and float away.

Should probably start revising bio/lit/Amath/SS but eh.

Day 1 of lurking was okay.

I've decided that I should be focusing more on nurturing my buddy and bringing her out of her shell more than anything else.

Will make a more conscious effort to leave house earlier to meet her at the door :>

Show her I'm a good buddy :)

Happy she got 'serious' with me today (Ironic if you don't get it haha)

Hope tomorrow she'll be more confident as we start doing MY class.

Will slowly start asking her out for dates to get to know her more than on the superficial level

Really hope she's enjoying Council thus far. :')

Anyway! Studies wise, it's been okay so far.

It's lovely sitting next to Alvina with Kelda and Jasmine in front and Theodora and Ya min at the back.

Feel happy that people around me are so nice :>

Specially Alvina. She's been SO nice recently and it's so warming.

Specially when she bought me tissue after recess when she saw me sniffing like a weirdo during Chinese.

Have to get her something over the weekend for her nice-ness. :]

This is a stark difference from the previous post but I realised today that bad things happen and shit happens but what defines us is how we rise after we fall.

In summary of this blog post, I've decided to be more positive and focus on the important things in my life right now eg. My buddy rather than what people in Council think of me and change my thinking and personality(tweak it like a knob on a big machine).

Day 1 of lurking = success. :]

Okay I should probably go revise some stuff before the guilt of slacking consumes me.

they scream, the worst things in life come free to us

So a couple of things have been happening so far, and lately I've been feeling like someone's been going inside of me and taking a pair of scissors and cutting the strings of my heart one by one and I'm slowly sinking in the dark depths of my insides.

Is it bad to assume the best in people? Assume that everyone is really who they are on the outside and behind their glittering facade they don't whisper other assumptions to other people. Maybe assuming anything out of anyone(good or bad) is really making an Ass out of U and Me.

In their defence(I think swords and armoury), maybe I should stop being this or that, or maybe I should stop trying to want to be liked so much. /if my porcelain white teacher were here, maybe she would critic my use of maybe/

It would be selfish to assume(har har) that I'm perfect that it's other people who hate on me. ('hate on me' plays in the background) I think that I should be more socially aware and sensitive? A part of me goes 'what good would that do? People already hate you'. True subconscious Gracia. I think it's more of the effort than anything? Maybe trying to be different will help. Yes. I will be different! (This sounds more of convincing myself to change).

I wish I could disappear(No I'm not suicidal). Maybe restart school as a clueless lil' sec 1. That would be lovely.

It's too cold outsideFor angels to flyAngels to fly To fly, flyFor angels to die

i am a night owl hear me make sounds owls do

LOL JK I sleep at 11 every night.

Since school holidays have started, I seem to be sleeping earlier and earlier!

That's a good thing.. right?

Short post seeing it's getting late and I'm getting tired.

It's either I'm growing OLDDD or I just love sleep.

Hope it's the latter!

On a side note, it's totally creepy when teachers get married and they actually have lives together with children etc.

It's strange. -shudders-

New life goal- to finish a game of monopoly!

Realised today I have never finished a full game before.

Just gave up when i got bored.

YES.

So life goal, finish monopoly!

It's getting late, bye reader!

psst: Hi claire.

do the hokey pokey

Hiiii.

You know that bad feeling you get when you realise you might have just ruined someone whom you admire a lot's respect in you? Yeah I'm experiencing that right now. I feel like I've just lost his respect in me by acting totally out of context and acting like an immature brat who didn't get what she wanted. Sighhhh.

I kind of miss Claire. She doesnt reply texts prolly cause she's busy with camp but i do miss talking to her. Claire I miss you!

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it won't be much longer, until I become a pretty wallflower

Ah. I wish we had winter in Singapore.

3 consecutive camps this week!

Pray I won't die.

Today I wore different socks on each foot and I felt so badass cause no one knew about them but me. :]

they keep me thinking that we almost had it all

Something that I have discovered as I continue living life..

We make friends, get really close to them and they know all your secrets and then, they leave.

Or rather, you guys grow apart.

What happens to all the secrets, the memories and everything?

All that's left is awkward conversations when you guys try to rekindle the friendship.

Isn't it sad?

Up to now, I have not met a friend who knows my deepest darkest secrets and has stayed with me till the end.

Or maybe I'm just someone who distances themselves from people once I feel I've gotten too close.

Isn't it iroinic?

How i yearn for someone who stays with me yet I push people away.

Life is strange.

We are strange.

Strange is we.

Strange is life.

On a side note, today I slothed at home and watched The Pupil and then proceeded to have dinner with my mother at Clementi Mall. This lovely chinese restaurant that had lovely chicken rice. It was really the loveliest chicken rice ever. *Moans in satisfaction* I enjoy spending time with my Mother. She makes me feel loved and cared for. If only she learnt to be more affectionate.